| AMERICAN
ROCK BAND
WHITE DIAMOND'S INTERVIEW
BEVERLY
HILLS, CALIFORNIA To
give you an idea of how entertaining the White Diamond Rock Band movie project
was, here is the transcript from one of the segments we filmed: THE
BACKSTAGE CAFÉ INTERVIEW Ian
Copeland, the owner of the illustrious Beverly Hills Backstage Café, and
one of rock music's top managers, kindly allowed me to gather White Diamond together
and film an interview at his wonderful establishment. This was quite an honor
considering he oversaw the careers of Joan Jett, the Police, Sting and other well
known artists. Hey, I am just a guy from Ohio… While
not everything we wanted on film got captured that day, here is the transcript
from what we DID get that evening. I think you will agree the gig offered us a
bit more than we had planned for. Thanks go to fitness model turned newscaster
Brenda Kelly for getting the guys to loosen up while she interviewed us. Brenda
made the evening both relaxing and captivating for not only the band but the many
unexpected guests. This time I want you thinking Spinal Tap or Hard Day’s
Night. Everything you read where there seems to be a little tension or jeering,
it’s tongue in cheek. Enjoy… BRENDA:
Hello. My name is Brenda Kelly and I'm a journalist looking into the very interesting
story of White Diamond. In 1990, down on the Sunset Strip in Hollywood there was
a band that was as good as any of the others got. They unfortunately were the
victims of an industry cutback like many other bands signed by the same label
at the time. However, not to be mistaken for anyone else amongst all the hair
spray, spandex and makeup, God knows I know I had mine at the time too, this one
band in particular, White Diamond, took the stage and their audiences by storm
wearing just blue jeans and t-shirts. And that’s all they needed. No gimmicks.
The music spoke volumes. Now, a decade later, after being handed raw deals from
the music industry, not being able to play the music they wanted to, then fading
away into obscurity, White Diamond has now earned themselves a respectable position
as one of the hottest bands on the internet. So naturally when I discovered they
were based here in L.A. and were the focus of a film project, well, I Brenda Kelly
decided it was high time to sit them down myself for a talk. And now I’ve
got them! I’ve got them all right here in front of me. WOW. (Turns to the
band.) Hi guys! Your music is so exciting! How did you come up with it all? It
seems almost intelligent compared to what’s out now, or was out in ‘90.  JAY:
Yeah, glam metal is hardly brain surgery, laughs.
BRENDA:
I dig your jacket dude (to Bjorn). BJORN:
(Looking around) What is the name of this place again? DON:
This is Ian Copeland’s Backstage Lounge of Café. Sorry, Café. BJORN:
Oh, that’s right, Sting’s old manager. DAVE:
I don’t think that’s how Ian wants represented, Bjorn. Show some respect.
(A fan walks over and hands Don a napkin to autograph. He looks embarrassed.) FAN
#1: Your music is so awesome! It’s like you know what I am thinking... I
am normally into goth! Why don’t you do some death metal? I am a little
depressed sometimes and… DON:
Whoah yeah! I can see it now! You wanted White Diamond but you’re getting
Danzig!! NEAL:
(To the fan) We are ‘happy’ metal, dear. You might want to listen
to the Backstreet Boys if you want depressing music! (Everyone laughs) BRENDA:
Alright, one at a time now, who are you and where are you from? DON:
(Sips from a coffee.) I am Don Lemmon from Newton Falls, Ohio. I reside in Las
Vegas, Nevada. JAY:
Where the hell is that? I am Jay von Mohr, also from Ohio. But not Newton Falls.
Is that a farm town? (Everyone laughs.)
NEAL: Neal Grusky, and I am from neither
here nor there. BJORN:
(In his Swedish accent) I am Jack Michaels, no, I am Bjorn Englen from Sweden.
Do you like my hair Brenda? Bryan, I mean Dave, it is your turn. DAVE:
Me? BJORN:
You're the only one left (laughs) DAVE:
I am Dave Jordan. From America. BJORN:
Want to add 'North America' to that (laughs)? He is from Canada, Montreal. BRENDA:
What instruments do you play? DON:
Nothing worth mentioning. JAY:
Guitars, some piano & I sing like a humming bird. NEAL:
Guitars mostly. BJORN:
Bass and some guitar. DAVE:
Drums and percussion… BRENDA:
Who makes your favorite or most used piece of equipment? DON:
Nautilus and Joe Weider (laughs). JAY:
I use Fender guitars, primarily Stratocaster, and Mesa Boogie amps. NEAL:
I am a Fender and Marshall man. BJORN:
I equip all my basses with Daniel Mari Strings and Hipshot D-tuners. DAVE:
Yamaha all the way! Zildjian symbols, Vick Ford sticks... BRENDA:
When did you start playing and what is your professional schooling? DON:
I have had various vocal teachers since 1988. None since 1991 so let's cross our
fingers! (Laughs) JAY:
I started playing my Mom’s old beat up acoustic when I was 15. I have an
Associates degree in Music Education majoring in Classical from Sinclair College
in Dayton, Ohio. After that I graduated from Musicians Institute here in California.
NEAL:
I began at 13 years old. I never needed schooling, just kidding. BJORN:
I'm self taught, but still ended up doing a year at B.I.T. where I later did some
teaching. DAVE:
I was 9 years old when I started. I went to the Lasalle music academy and the
Musician's professional workshop in Montreal, then PIT in LA. BRENDA:
Besides White Diamond, what other bands have you performed with? DON:
That would be it. I have written with a lot of people though. JAY:
I've mostly worked with individual players or groups on the recording end of things
for my own projects. I haven't been into playing in a band much besides this.
I’m a loner. NEAL:
No comment, they came before White Diamond and Takara and folded years back. BJORN:
Soul Sign, Heaven & Earth, Quiet Riot and Ashen, whom I actually joined only
a couple of months after Dave left the band... DAVE:
Ashen, Vanity Kills, June Street among many others. Like Secret Beauty Cream. BJORN:
Dave, I thought you were a nice guy. You forgot Soul Sign AND my solo album. BRENDA:
Tell me about the most recent bands you are with. DON:
I haven't done a thing in 10 years. I needed a break, White Diamond is the first
and only. JAY:
I’ve worked with another singer and we co-wrote a song called Woodstock
Rain. DON:
It is being considered for use in a movie and by several publishers actually.
Lately I've been trying to get songs on my new solo album out. I will be recording
it in Nashville. NEAL:
My other band is a hard rock band that plays in L.A. regularly. Takara. Top 20
in Japan… BJORN:
Soul Sign. It's a growling, heavy melodic rock, very cool and fun band for me
to play in! DAVE:
June Street, it's led by EMI and a R&B recording artist named London. It is
a blend of classic rock, R&B, funk & classical music, which results in
an interesting yet universally appealing mix. BJORN:
I need a dictionary to understand all that! Laughs. BRENDA:
I wonder if that’s the same London who is now singing with Nikki Sixx and
Traci Guns? How did you meet each other? DON:
John Corabi is in that project too. It’s not the same London. JAY:
A mutual friend mentioned I was a musician and then one thing led to another.
We met for coffee one day, spoke a couple more times, he listened to my stuff,
I listened to his, we all went out one night and BOOM! NEAL:
Same thing, I was referred to Don so I submitted a tape. We met for coffee and
spoke a few times, he listened to my tape, liked what he heard, made me an offer
and then over coffee again another time, well, here we are. BJORN:
The man likes his coffee. (Looks around) Let me guess, were you guys freaked out
by how much cream he uses? (All agree.) DAVE:
Well, Bjorn introduced me to Don at his birthday party once and then, over coffee,
laughs, laughs again. BJORN:
Don and I met at a party in the Valley one summer. The funny thing is, he had
me teaching him bass at the time. I did not know he was a singer, nor that he
was involved with a real band previously. DON:
I went to see Bjorn play a few times, once or twice with other bands, like three
of them and well, over coffee, laughs, here we are. We ended up hangin' out a
bit and before we knew it’,’ we had to wear T-shirts saying "NOT
Gay" so people didn’t confuse us in any way. BRENDA:
Yes, that’s so cool to know and here we all are. Coffee and cream anyone?
(Laughs.) What is the biggest problem you have with the music industry you can
think of now? DON:
No problem at all with it unless it has a problem with me. JAY:
Where do I start? I think the main thing is that people should understand that
the labels are multi-national conglomerates that simply want to turn the highest
profit with the cheapest costing product. Just tell me why you think everyone
loves rap? It's dirt cheap to have a guy talk into the mic, double it, then leave.
Everything else can be stolen, I mean sampled to complete the record. I recommend
every musician read the books by Tim Sweeney on how to NOT get ripped off by labels. NEAL:
It's hard enough to get signed to a major label, you're not making it easier,
laughs. BJORN:
Without sounding political, it's the politics. And also without sounding arrogant,
I think I am a pretty good bass player, but that isn't as important to labels
as whatever the latest trends are. The guys at the labels, A&R guys and such,
that are signing bands know very little about music and are usually just selecting
puppets, not professionals to promote. Pretty sad. DAVE:
Companies these days do not want to develop artists long term. They think 1, 2,
3 and maybe 5 years ahead for you and then you're cut. BRENDA:
Ten years ago, what was the biggest problem with the music industry? DON:
The same thing wrong with it 3 years ago, 5 years ago, now and in the future.
There’s too much of the same thing being released and it’s all catering
to keeping you brain dead. It all has to stop somewhere. JAY:
I agree with Dave. Some labels back then were a little more willing to keep a
band happy if they were good. If you sold less than gold on your first album 15
years ago, they would help you develop into a multi-platinum act over time. Definitely
not the case now! NEAL:
It was an oversaturated market with weak bands getting signed left and right 10
years ago. One hit wonders are really just some acts that the companies promoted
just long enough to make their money back. BJORN:
The industry was saturated by lousy hair bands, which overshadowed the good bands
like White Diamond, etc. When grunge came into the picture it was all over... DAVE:
They did not want to risk signing alternative artists then or now. They want to
follow trends, and when the trend dies, they create a new one. BRENDA:
What would you say has changed about your playing now as opposed to 10 years ago? DON:
Not a thing. Hopefully my voice is a little better than it was before. If not,
we will fix that in the studio like Jennifer Lopez and Britney Spears or N'Sync
do. Kidding. JAY:
I was more into the speed thing 10 years ago, which I think happened to most of
the people I went to M.I. with. You have heard the joke, "How many guitarists
does it take to screw in a light bulb? 10. One to do it & 9 to say how much
faster & better they could have done it!" I now focus more on the song's
music & melody. NEAL:
I have aged with grace and maturity! BJORN:
I have went from 135 to 180 pounds using Don Lemmon's Know How nutrition and exercise
plan (laughs)! DAVE:
I have much more finger control and gained fluidity in my movement. At least that’s
what my girlfriend says. BJORN:
I may not be as fast, but I sure am an overall better bass player. BRENDA:
What was appealing in regards to the White Diamond project that intrigued you
enough to join the band, or in Don's case, restart it? DON:
I never really felt the music industry had anything to do with creating great
music, or at least good music. They are only concerned with marketing it or setting
trends. I wanted to do something people enjoyed, but more so, that I could enjoy
without hopping onto a trend and changing my style. So I did just that. Twice
now. 
JAY:
The fact is that most musicians don't get anywhere because they only know music.
Even the ones who do get educated about the industry typically don't want to take
on the chore it can be, but Don seemed to have a few aces up his sleeve. The demos
he played for me sounded good. So I figured, what the Hell, he's cool, he likes
tequila, he's fun and he's not intimidated by the business side of things. In
fact, it turns out he's pretty good at it. NEAL:
I have been approached before to join other bands but the thing that intrigued
me was that Don flat out said this would be a no commitment situation. I wouldn't
have to stop what I am doing to make this happen nor let it interfere with whatever
else I had going on. He told me from day one, "Just be there when I need
you and let me do the rest." I needed a break from doing all the work in
my other band, so I agreed. BJORN:
One, Don's big winkie and two, he told me there would be whores in the studio,
on the tour bus, in the hotels, on the planes and I believed him. Are they here
yet? Where are they Don? You promised! DAVE:
Don pursued me hard enough that I knew he was at least serious. That's unusual.
Musicians are typically flakes. He was the first person in a while to come along
that didn't seem flaky. BJORN:
Oh, I have a few stories (laughs). DON:
Shut up Bjorn. BRENDA:
Obviously if you were to do a new album or play live, it would sound a lot different.
But what changes would you make if you were to re-record everything today? DON:
I would love the demos to be redone. A live "WD" project would be fun.
JAY:
I think that it all boils down to a "group sound" thing. Every group
has its own sound and way of recording music. I think it's simply a matter of
focusing on making new songs that shine and come alive off the CD. The group's
"sound" will determine the opinion of whether it needed change or if
the change was even noticeable. NEAL:
Huh? (Everybody laughs.) I like what is on the website and what is on the demos
a lot. I do. But I am sure that since most of the songs are 10 years old, updating
them would include just putting my own updated personality into the music. BJORN:
If I were to actually redo the CD’s, which I might be fine with just redoing
the vocals, seeing as I would rather record all new stuff anyhow, I would at least
add a little funk to go along with Neal's groove for sure. DAVE:
I agree with Neal. Jay is crazy (laughs). I will put my sound and feel to the
songs and that will probably sound a little different than 10 years ago, but you
know, the drums used on the demos aren't the drums I use today, either. BRENDA:
Let's discuss the history of the band. I understand Don started the band back
in 1989? JAY:
Well, this ‘is’ Don Lemmon’s band anyway you but unlike in 1991,
he gives us complete freedom. Just kidding Don. It is his baby and he is who gathered
us all together. Before he came along we were all in different projects. I for
one have done mostly studio and session work and thought this sounded fun. BJORN:
I was in the Swedish Meatballs (He laughs.) BRENDA:
Hey! I think I have heard of them! DON:
Everyone loves Bjorn’s Swedish Meatballs. DAVE:
Is there any other type of meatball? DON:
I don’t think so but now, 10 years since our style isn’t out of style,
and knowing none of these guys here were thrilled with what they had going on,
it made sense to bring them together and re-form this band. NEAL:
So we became The Lemmon Drops. (Laughs) JAY:
(laughing) I thought it was the Lemmon Heads. DON:
Actually... I wanted to change the name from White Diamond, however, with the
internet following… BRENDA:
Why or why not use the name White Diamond? DON:
There was already White… BJORN:
Snake… JAY:
Lion... DAVE:
Tiger…. The era had a lot of ‘white’ bands. NEAL:
I kind of like White Diamond still. BRENDA:
(Looking at her notes) And Dave, the drummer, you were a drug addict... BJORN:
It wasn’t Dave. It’s Don. Or Bryan in the story. DON:
No it wasn’t Dave. Dave just looks like a drug addict but he isn’t.
(Everyone agrees and laughs.) And although he doesn’t look it, he is a great
drummer, better than most. And he too has a way with the ladies, what a good looking
guy... DAVE:
Thanks, you’re too kind. Really. Thanks. BRENDA:
So what happened to the drug addict? DON:
He got involved with a porn star and well, that’s all I am legally permitted
to discuss, just kidding (laughs). JAY:
The member in question wasn’t really a drug addict, he just dabbled in it
because it was trendy back then. Porn stars too. BRENDA:
And your first bassist was replaced by Bjorn… BJORN:
There wasn’t a bassist at first, well, Don was the bass player. (Laughs.)
I came aboard because I gave Don lessons at one point but… What is the point? BRENDA:
What happened to your original music? DON:
Mind you, we are discussing people who were sensationalized for the story... DAVE:
I heard Tommy died. You told me he died. DON:
No, I said at one point he’s better off dead. He doesn’t do anything
for a living these days. Mid thirties, lives with his grandmother… That’s
just the guy’s name… BRENDA:
Guys, you are ignoring me. NEAL:
Wow. BJORN:
Grandmother? DON:
That’s what I heard. BJORN:
Can you say that? Does that make you look bad? JAY:
How does that make Don look bad? I go nuts just thinking about people like that. DON:
Dude, it’s a name and a character, none of you are living with grandparents.
(Another fan comes over.) FAN
#2: Hey guys! (Hands Dave something.) DAVE:
How are you? (Signs an autograph.) FAN
#2: Good! It’s Jay! How you doing? Come over here (said to friend). I want
you to meet these guys. FAN
#3: Who is this? FAN
#2: Come over here... Guys, this is my best friend… DON:
Hello (shakes her hand) What’s your name? FAN
#3: I am a writer for a music magazine. Band:
What magazine? BRENDA:
“You Gotta Read This.” DON:
Read what? No, that’s my magazine. FAN
#2: This magazine (holds one up)! BJORN:
Hey, she’s hot (grabs mag to see the cover)! FAN
#2: Well, I just wanted her to meet you… NEAL:
And it was very nice to meet you both! FAN
#3: Can we take a picture together? Where's my camera? (Looks for camera) What's
your name? BRENDA:
Brenda FAN
#2: Brenda? Can you take this? BRENDA:
(Adjusts camera as band poses with fans.) Think pretty! You’re so ‘it’!
Yeah baby! (Flash bulb lights up, fans leave). How did they know you were here? DON:
I think I mentioned it on the website or something. JAY:
See www.whitediamondrockband.com It’s gotten quite popular since being posted
in October of 2001. BRENDA:
I for one am looking forward to your tour! BAR
PATRON: Excuse me... Are you reading this (picks up a copy of Don’s magazine)? BJORN:
Yeah, have you got to read this? BAR
PATRON: Yeah, I do. BJORN:
Yeah? BAR
PATRON: You know what? It's OK if you’re tied to it. I wouldn’t want
to… DON:
Bjorn, give him the magazine before he starts to cry or something. (To patron)
He’s just kidding. BAR
PATRON: I see who the boss is here. BJORN:
Dude, here’s the stupid magazine. BRENDA:
Boys, boys….. BAR
PATRON: I’m a man’s man baby, I ain’t no boy. BRENDA:
Good enough, just take the magazine and buzz off. We are in the middle of something
here. BAR
PATRON: You know, it's people like you that…. JAY:
Some people’s children, man. NEAL:
You know his parents? BAR
PATRON: You talking about my mother? DON:
NO! Now LEAVE! (Don stands up and points to the door. As the patron leaves, sits
back down). Wow, tour… BJORN:
As I explained to you last night while we were laying in bed Brenda (winks at
Brenda)… BRENDA:
Yeah right Bjorn! BJORN:
…the marketing of the music comes first. BAR
PATRON: (Sticks head back in room) Your last album sucked by the way! BJORN:
We didn’t have a last album you idiot! DON:
So anyhow, promotion, if successful, will justify booking the dates. We are preparing
for some isolated shows like in my current home of Vegas because there people
can plan a whole vacation out of the trip… DAVE:
Be assured that if the albums take off outside of Vegas…I am all about playing
anywhere we can. BJORN:
Starting the promo online has earned us a worldwide following already as opposed
to an isolated following in just one city… JAY:
So anything could happen. We are doing great all over so far but not well enough
to set up a strict tour schedule. We are going only where we are demanded. BRENDA:
What are you guys talking about? Don't you feel you guys have enough of an effect
on your fans they would come see you anywhere you play? DON:
That’s really the point of doing Vegas exactly. But what promoter wants
a band that they have never heard of to try and sell tickets for anywhere else?
We have to justify our position. Most bands start off in one city and build outward.
We have started from the outward building in. NEAL:
While we have 100,000 people dead serious about the band, like with my other band
TAKARA, since they are from all over the place, we simply need to select where
the following is most concentrated to do a show. JAY:
100 people in 1000 places doesn’t pull it off. 3300 in 30 might. BRENDA:
At several major music site message boards, it seems you have both hot and cold
responses to the band’s first promo CD. Why is that? DON:
The controversy comes from two areas. One, from the fact I didn’t do the
singing on the initial release so people do not consider me the actual vocalist.
And two, there were people who asked to contribute to the film, but were rejected,
and now they are stalking us. Some people frequent those message boards to talk
smack out of envy. BRENDA:
Well, the reviews of the songs are incredible no matter who is singing. You wrote
the songs, correct? DON:
For the most part, yes I did. BJORN:
Considering the songs are all technically over 10 years old, the fact that people
like them today goes to show there is a lot to be envied. The people whining are
those who failed both then and now to have their own stuff heard. I would be jealous
too, but not vindictive. BRENDA:
You say that so professionally.... Do you think most bands this good are arrogant? NEAL:
That doesn’t work for us. BJORN:
Works for me! I mean, come on, it must be frustrating for us to come out of nowhere
and get exposure like this. DON:
Yeah, there they are, doing all they can, and having nothing to show for their
efforts. (A fan walks over.) FAN#4:
I have a joke! How do you make a bass player turn down the volume? Put a chart
in front of him. BJORN:
Not funny. FAN#4:
What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?
DON:
Caressed it softly and told it that he loved it. JAY:
That wasn’t funny either. NEAL:
It was sort of funny. FAN#4:
What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine? You only have to tell
the drum machine what to play once. DAVE:
Thanks, once again, you’re too kind. DON:
That’s sorta funny. FAN#4:
Singers.... these are people who couldn't learn to play a real instrument. BJORN:
Was that funny Don? DON:
Anyways, all those ideas about touring or not and all that, we’ll tour,
but it’ll be different than tours of 1991 because things have changed since
1991. We might play in one city one month for a couple thousand people and then
another the following month. We’ll keep it fun. We’ll see. BRENDA:
Where did you guys disappear to all these years since… DAVE:
Well, there's no reason to go out and promote a band that doesn't exist.... I’ve
just been drumming.
BJORN: Back before the soundtrack to the movie was compiled,
well, nothing was going on. We all had other musical projects outside of WD. BRENDA:
I heard you boys got a new album coming out. DON:
There are 2 CD’s done for the film.... BRENDA:
The Lost Demos? JAY:
That’s the promo release. NEAL:
There are 2 other CD’s put together especially for the film. The demos have
a Norwegian singing and that will be used only for the documentary. JAY:
Then the 3rd one we will finally finish in Nashville. Technically that is Don’s
solo album BARTENDER:
Does anybody need anything? BRENDA:
I’m alright. JAY:
Water please. DAVE:
Ummm… (Looks at menu) DON:
Veggie burger, low fat cheese, no mayo. BJORN:
A long tall BLONDE! NEAL:
Cheeseburger! BRENDA:
The cover of this CD… Tell me more about this. (She looks at the cover of
the CD.) DON:
We weren’t really sure who the actors in the movie were going to be, but
we knew the names of the characters… So we distorted the members on the
poster. Jason Gateman of Think Big Designs made that. JAY:
Yes, we decided instead of letting the cat out of the bag and letting people know
who we were… BRENDA:
You can give it to me straight, you know. DAVE:
A lot of people don't understand the cover. DON:
True, because we didn’t think it was important to explain who the original
members were at first. It was just going to be a story. A book, a documentary
using actors… That’s why we hired someone else to sing and well, we
distorted the images on the CD so you couldn’t see who was who…It’s
Hollywood! BRENDA:
Some people say you are hiding something. DON:
Exactly... When the movie project began Bjorn Englen was in a cover band, Dave
in another signed act, Neal has Takara and Jay was doing some solo stuff of his
own. I am a writer. We weren’t exactly “White Diamond” at that
place and time. So we were content with the band members remaining anonymous…
Or allowing people to assume we were something created for a movie. BJORN:
And we are all 10 years older than the characters in the film anyhow, wouldn’t
look right. NEAL:
(Nods head and appears to be thinking.) BRENDA:
You guys look great for rockers in your thirties but yeah, you don’t look
21 anymore. I see… JAY:
No we don't, this is 2002, not 1990. BRENDA:
So the original idea was to put the actors on the CD… Am I following this
idea? DON:
You’re finally getting it (laughs). But the actors weren’t selected
yet. I had other ideas for the cover than this but this one added to the intrigue
I think. BRENDA:
Sure beats a lot of album covers I have seen in a long time. Will you be doing
a video for the album? BJORN:
If this interview comes out well, this will be it... JAY:
If we did a video ourselves for the soundtrack, Don would have to lip sync as
it’s not him singing. So… NEAL:
And I play things a little different than I did back in 1991 so the video would
look silly. BRENDA:
Will the actors do a video? DON:
Oh, I don’t know. Probably but this isn’t really the age of rock videos
anymore. Since I personally am the ‘label’ behind it all now, I would
say no. But some things are simply left up to the film producers, which I’m
not. DAVE:
At least we have full control over what gets released. I think every song on this
album would be a hit if released in 1990. (Someone walks in.) BRENDA:
There is a little controversy over the soundtrack. Would you care to elaborate? NEAL:
Don placed an ad in May to record some tunes for the soundtrack and by February,
it should have been all done. He left L.A. and did not return for a year and the
guy he hired still hadn't finished the job... BJORN:
The White Diamond website hasn't even been up promoting anything in who knows
how long because of this and waiting to secure rights to other music... DON:
The truth of the matter is that the guy I hired put together music for me which
failed to be finished on time. I hoped to build interest on it with fresh versions
of old music the original band used to perform... I didn't have the old band together
yet nor time with everything else going on in my life to re-record my own work.
All we had to go on was crappy demos or whatever else we tossed together... So
I hired someone else... And they didn't do all I requested on time... JAY:
Here comes someone... FAN
#5: Excuse me (to Brenda), who are these people? BRENDA:
This is White Diamond. FAN
#5: THE White Diamond? Wow, I got your CD off the internet! Wow, cool. How are
you guys? When’s the next album? Wow! How cool! What are you doing here? BRENDA:
They are being interviewed for a documentary. FAN
#5: Can I watch? JAY:
You know what, that’s cool. Pull up a seat. BRENDA:
Bjorn, Dave and Jay, you guys all went to professional music schools. BJORN:
We didn't all go at once... (He digs his nose then wipes something on Don’s
chair). But yeah, we did. NEAL:
I didn’t. I am self taught. DON:
(Getting up.) What's that on my chair? BJORN:
That's a booger! DON:
What's it doing on my chair? BJORN:
I didn’t want it on MY chair. DON:
Get it off my chair, that’s disgusting man. BJORN:
Where do I put it? I don’t want it on MY chair. FAN
#5: (To Don) Can I have a sip of that? (Reaches for Don’s drink) DON:
(Shaking his head, looks to Bjorn in disgust.) NO. DON’T touch my drink.
I don’t know you. BRENDA:
How old are you guys? DON:
(Still visibly upset over something gooey on his chair, he wipes it up with a
napkin) We are each in our early 30’s. You already mentioned that. BRENDA:
What was the first song that you ever wrote? DON:
A song I wrote for my cheerleader girlfriend in high school called Angel. Her
name was Angele. BRENDA:
Is it on any of the forthcoming albums? DON:
Nope. BRENDA:
Can you remember it? Can you sing it? DON:
No, thanks anyway (still upset over the food service). BJORN:
Come on Don, how did it go? JAY:
I could sing you my Hugh Hefner tribute song... NEAL:
Jay’s plea for adoption into the Holy gates of the Hefner Mansion! It’s
great! DON:
A booger. Nice (finishes wiping it up). BRENDA:
Let's talk about your music. You do not sing about sex and partying but about
more meaningful things. Love found, love lost, having fun, gaining faith, etc.
What will the new music be like? DAVE:
I would love to do a little funky jazz piece with these guys if we record new
stuff. JAY:
I want to do a little instrumental piece because blowing my gas every solo on
every song just to show I can play a guitar isn’t my thing anymore... NEAL:
Yeah, that’s why we have only one guitarist playing one solo at a time too.
Neither of us have the interest of playing all the solos. 
BJORN:
I do not care what we record but it’ll be good. DON:
We must finish those last 12 songs left undone for the past 11 years first. FAN
#5: Can I ask a question? (Starts to look almost a little hysterical) DON:
Certainly. DAVE:
What? FAN
#5: Well, I don't know where to start. I’m so nervous. I think I offended
you with my jokes. DON:
Calm down… It's no big deal. You were joking right? FAN
#5: I'm sorry, I’m just some small town girl… JAY:
Yeah, um, it's ok, is this another joke? FAN
#5: I’m alright, don't worry about me... It won't happen again. Sorry. NEAL:
Does this bother anyone but me? BJORN:
It's a little freaky. DAVE:
Excuse me, I need to take a break. (Bartender comes over and escorts fan #5 away.) BRENDA:
That was interesting. (Another fan comes in) FAN
#6: Who are you guys? JAY:
We are the new Van Halen. Eddie fired both Sammy and Dave and replaced everyone
else with us. FAN
#6: Right, well, welcome to Hollywood. If you’re a rock band, you probably
need some heroin or crack. Let me know. I am your man. (Hands Dave a card) BJORN:
Told you. You look like a crack addict (laughs) so gain some weight! BARTENDER:
Here are your orders. DON:
This burger is made of meat. BARTENDER:
Yes we ran out of veggie burgers. DON:
That's not good enough. I wanted a veggie… BARTENDER:
Well, it’s a considerably bigger burger to make up for it. DON:
If I wanted meat, I would have ordered a steak! JAY:
A steak doesn’t sound good. I will have chicken. DON:
I want to see the manager. (Bartender leaves.) BJORN:
I will take care of it. (Stands up, sits down.) MANAGER:
(A woman.) Well aren’t you a good looking bunch of men! DON:
Flattery? Look, I want a veggie burger, not a beef burger, turkey burger or anything
other than a veggie burger and baked slices of potatoes. MANAGER:
What's the problem, sir? DON:
(To Jay) Can you help me out, please? JAY:
Dude, what am I supposed to do? Cook it? DON:
Why can’t a person just get what he ordered? It’s on the menu! What’s
the problem? MANAGER:
I can bring you a fresh burger sir. DON:
Do you know the difference between apples and oranges? BRENDA:
I think so... DON:
Not you Brenda. MANAGER:
One burger is from an animal, the other is made from vegetables. I know sir, I
have your book. You eat carbs with carbs, proteins with fats. I understand. My
apologies. (Fan #7 enters) FAN
#7: Bjorn Englen! Can I have your autograph? (Bjorn shakes the young man’s
hand.) JAY:
What about me kid? Want mine too? FAN
#7: (Hands Jay a WD CD.) Yeah! (Everyone signs his CD but Dave who is missing.)
Where is Dave? Where are you guys playing in town? DON:
We have a few private shows coming up. Email the website and we will put you on
the guest list. BJORN:
We are playing the Staples Center. JAY:
Since when? NEAL:
That's a big place. DON:
He was kidding. Some serious offers have come in for 3000 seat arenas actually.
But locally, it’s just a series of clubs because we intend on making them
into a compilation concert video and Live CD for the website. BRENDA:
Where is your manager? Can I mention his name? BJORN:
That no talent butt clown? Harold? DON:
He's talented, but until he signs on the dotted line, he will simply be know as
the butt clown. JAY:
That's right. DON:
That's right? Harold’s a good guy, he just had other commitments. NEAL:
Where’s my cheeseburger? BRENDA:
The last time 80’s hair bands or melodic rock groups toured America, it
was 1990. They performed at 20,000 seat venues, but it seems that now, in 2002,
they're all being booked into 1,000 seat arenas, 500 maximum capacity bars, and
I was just wondering, does this mean it’s not such a good idea to try and
tour at all? DON:
We aren’t really touring. Like I was saying, we go where the following may
be so we do not waste anyone’s time. The Beach Boys aren’t radio favorites
anymore but people still see them. NEAL:
I think the problem is, bands tour without releasing new music or they tour when
no one cares to see them! Create a reason and then tour. BRENDA:
How does it feel to be in the “Where Are They Now” or “Who The
Heck Are They” Category? BJORN:
I'm not really sure either of those work cause we have all been quite busy over
the past decade. We aren’t pumping gas or anything. JAY:
Make that pumping gas YET (laughs). I think “The Band That Almost Was”
is a better category. Listen to the music. Tell me we deserve to be lost in the
shuffle of some major label’s corporate decision making. BRENDA:
You’re right, the music is very well produced. DON:
Well it sounds a bit funky, jazzy, almost ahead of it’s time for the 80’s
era actually... NEAL:
I do not like the “80’s” labeling at all. The worst of the 80’s
bands didn’t make it to the 90’s and those from the 90’s had
a sound nothing like White Diamond. Maybe the bands that were from the 80’s
and released music in 1990 and 1991, maybe that’s a better comparison. White
Diamond was more like that. DON:
The idea people would think we wore spandex, makeup and hair spray is truly depressing. BJORN:
It really puts things a bit out of perspective to say we were an 80’s band. BJORN:
Where's Dave? MANAGER:
Here we go, plenty of veggie burgers for everybody... Enjoy! DON:
I never thought you’d be back. (Takes a bite.) MANAGER:
Well? What do you think? DON:
Is this a quiz show now? I ordered this an hour ago. JAY:
No, it’s been under an hour... DON:
Is this mayonnaise? BJORN:
It’s never good enough is it? DON:
NO. She read the book. She knows better than to put mayo on my sandwich. Don’t
you? MANAGER:
Yes. I feel awful about this... JAY:
(Smelling his glass.) My glass has lipstick on it! (gags) What is this? DON:
Who is the chef? Is this for real? It’s awful. MANAGER:
The cook is a fan actually. DAVE:
(Comes back in the room.) Did you see who the cook is? I wouldn’t eat anything
if I were you. MANAGER:
I will take care of this! (Leaves room.) BRENDA:
Who is the cook? Be nice Don. DAVE:
Someone who wanted in the band 10 years ago but they were quite awful. DON:
I can be a bit demanding, but that’s only to cover my butt. Is it who I
think it is? NEAL:
Don is a little forthcoming for some people. BRENDA:
Well, how does that go over with the other band members? JAY:
Well, what happens is I have to grab him and shake him at times. At least he isn’t
an egomaniac, he is just demanding. As long as he isn’t vomiting in your
car, I don’t care what he does. BJORN:
But I am really demanding too if you gotta know. DAVE:
Don and Bjorn go after each other’s throats at times but they never really
get mad in a hateful way. It’s like a brotherhood... NEAL:
Don, Jay and I being from small towns, we kind of relate to each other too well
to take anything personal. DON:
There's a lot of love in the room... DAVE:
As long as there's communication... BRENDA:
Wow, that's great. (Two more fans enter.) FAN
#8: Hey! You guys really are here! I love you guys, and heard you were here and... BRENDA:
Isn’t the restaurant supposed to be closed? FAN
#8: I love your stuff (to Don)! DON:
And what is your name? FAN
#8: Oh, I am Bambi. BJORN:
Hello, Bambi. FAN
#8: And this is Teresa. JAY:
Hello, Teresa... FAN
#9: A pleasure to meet you. DON:
Dave, where were you all that time? DAVE:
I was in that room across the restaurant area and past the bar to the left and
around the… DON:
It took you that long to find it or use it? DAVE:
Both. BRENDA:
We checked with some of the radio stations who have been playing your CD and they
seem to be getting a lot of requests for more and more White Diamond. How’s
it feel? DON:
I think it is due to the songwriting. BJORN:
Well I suppose that's true…. But the music is superb no matter. BRENDA:
I don’t know if it’s just me but the demo singer seemed to have some
trouble pronouncing a few words here and there… JAY:
Is it that bad? These are just demos. DON:
Yeah.... It’s bad. DAVE:
Where did he… NEAL:
You didn't notice…? DAVE:
To be honest, I don’t listen to the words…. DON:
But you’re part of the CD. DAVE:
Yes, of course, but I listen to the drum and the melody, not the spoken word,
or lyrics sang, whatever, you know what I mean. Even when I record… BJORN:
So you didn’t hear the mispronounced lyrics. DON:
The vocals are fine, it’s only in a few spots… JAY:
Well I think maybe... BJORN:
It's interesting that she's bringing it up. BRENDA:
People have mentioned it. DON:
Either way, it’s like my asking if you are using a treadmill instead of
a stair stepper to exercise these days. Only a trained eye, or ear in this matter,
would notice. BJORN:
Not true. Apples and oranges. DON:
Not really. Most people haven’t a clue how hard it is to record an album.
Ask anyone who has tried. Most can’t compare to what we have. It isn’t
due to my finances, it’s dedication and such. I am defensive only because
the band did a great job with this music considering all I did was send them the
songs and a lyric sheet with nothing else to go by. I could redo those vocals
done in a week. JAY:
In a week? BJORN:
Oh, come on. DON:
Can we move on... I hired the guy because he couldn’t be confused for me… BRENDA:
I love this. I wish I were able to catch you guys like this twice, I bet that’s
not possible... BJORN:
Well I think you’d really have a good time, or a better time if you would
have a few drinks Brenda... JAY:
Oh shut up!!! DON:
(Rubbing eyes.) I knew it wouldn't be easy. JAY:
Please, please, just a moment. Musically we all know what we want even if those
filling in may not. BRENDA:
Well good. A little confusing but good. DAVE:
But you're not as confused as Bjorn Englen is are you? Bjorn always confuses me. DON:
It's my job to do what best represents the creative force of this band. The reason
we are here today is to discuss the fact we are being asked to reunite for a few
shows and are considering a brand new CD on top of it all. It’s simple. BJORN:
(laughing) DON:
Now I am a clown or something? DAVE:
Amusing to say the least. DON:
What do you mean? NEAL:
“It’s all happening so fast.” BRENDA:
What you are trying to say is very simple and clear. I got you. I brought you
here… BJORN:
But will you take me home Brenda? BRENDA:
I am offering to help out here. DON:
No, you're not offering to help out. You're distracting Bjorn. BJORN:
Yes! Brenda is quite lovely! DAVE:
Here he goes again… BRENDA:
Exactly! DON:
All right, she's not interested in being your girlfriend. Let’s move on... BRENDA:
Girlfriend? BJORN:
You’re interested aren’t you? BRENDA:
Oh shut up!!! DON:
Exchange numbers later… JAY:
Can I raise another question at this point? DAVE:
Yeah. JAY:
We’re gonna do Vegas soon right? DON:
YES!!! BRENDA:
Casinos? Clubs? DON:
And actually we have 3 major casinos working with us for the film and video project.
Wait till you see what I have planned. We can’t announce anything yet. DAVE:
Yeah. There is at least one night, or in half the places, 2 or 3 nights, like
in South America... BRENDA:
And Canada, where you’re from, right Dave? DAVE:
Yep and we’ve got one show in Australia… BJORN:
Australia isn’t in Canada Dave. DAVE:
I know this. BJORN:
Sweden, where I am from, we will play there, and probably something in Norway,
London… JAY:
Ohio, where Don and I are from. Germany, and who knows where else. DON:
One stop in each state eventually. Maybe more. But again, right now there are
100,000 people on the mailing list. From those subscribers, we will determine
where first and where not at all. Traveling around the world just to do one show
per stop isn’t conducive either. We’ve covered this 30 times now or
am I getting tired? What time is it? JAY:
(Tells Don the time.) DON:
I would do a tour if Van Halen asked us to, maybe Bon Jovi, KISS or someone we
are compatible to having the same fans with, but I am also not opposed to doing
a show in say Youngstown, Ohio or Cleveland, maybe Pittsburgh, one of those areas
I am from. Maybe Columbus, Dayton, even Canada where Dave is from. Vancouver?
I am open, but you know me. It would be to play, film, make the video available
to the online fans, and that's about it. JAY:
I think we all agree that unless we were offered a slot on a real tour, bars are
out of the question. Unless we are fully accommodated, no bars. I am not a rock
star but I deserve full payment for my time, not all the beer I can drink. NEAL:
I do not mind bars, or nice sized clubs, but I am at a point now in my career
where a tour would need to be at least like Jay said, as a supporting act for
a known band or a well enough financed filming project. BJORN:
Definitely. Playing Vegas or San Diego and Los Angeles isn't out of the question
but we have all done the local scene. If it isn't on to bigger and better things,
then we will just do as Don planned. We will wait til it's possible to fly elsewhere,
film those shows, and make them available to the fans online. DAVE:
I think the days of the big rock tours are over anyhow. But I am open as long
as it pays well. BJORN:
Yeah, really. I don't want to sound greedy but it really doesn't help the band
much along the line if all we get is $50 a person to play in a bar, and end up
tired from traveling with no rest from show to show . We each have homes, futures
to build, that sort of stuff. DON:
Who will watch my dog? We need good accommodations for stuff like that too. We
are not desperate, but we are serious. BRENDA:
That's true. In case an offer does arise, what is the biggest crowd you personally
have played in front of or are prepared for? DON:
I could do arenas. Bars, like I said, I would do for fun, but winning over small
crowds for the sake of a gig doesn't compare to performing in front of a few thousand
people who are ready to have fun before you even get there. That’s an adrenaline
rush. JAY:
For me, I haven't performed at anything worth mentioning the past 10 years since
I've mainly concentrated on the recording side of my career. But I agree, I'd
rather play to a larger crowd than a smaller one. NEAL:
I have played in front of 5000 people. Let's do that any chance we get. BJORN:
I have opened up for Def Leppard in another band I won't mention, so arenas are
not a problem for me.  DAVE:
I have played for several thousand people and recently at an outdoor Latin festival
in downtown L.A.
DON:
Really? That's pretty cool. BJORN:
Uno! Dose! Trace! Undalay! Is that how you say 1,2,3 let's go in Spanish? (Everyone
laughs.)
BJORN: And Don is going to have to finish up vocals on all 3 WD CD’s
first… JAY:
Maybe after that, we will begin to do the shows and such. DAVE:
It’s Don’s call. DON:
I am only redoing vocals on 10 old songs and then my solo album. BRENDA:
How would you describe your association with Don over the years? BJORN:
We have all grown since we first met. With maturity doesn’t come difference.
Flexibility is what I would call it. DAVE:
Yeah, he’s more flexible now. Allowing one another to bend is what Don does
best. NEAL:
He can't sing like he used to but what do you expect from a nutritionist and former
bodybuilder? DON:
THANKS! (Everyone laughs.) JAY:
We're very lucky in the sense that we've got two geniuses in the band like Bjorn
and Don to butt heads on a regular basis. BRENDA:
I see that! JAY:
Don and Bjorn are the Lennon and McCartney of the group but one of them was never
qualified as a Beatle, so it's like cats and dogs. I am the animal control agent. BJORN:
What are you talking about? Jay, you’re the one who won the John Lennon
award. JAY:
That I did. DON:
Jay is the musical genius here. (Fan comes in.) FAN
#10: Hi, I'm here cause I wanted to meet Sting. JAY:
Yeah... He’s back flipping veggie burgers… DON:
Fine, may I start by saying how thrilled we are to have you here, we are such
fans of his music, and have all of his records. JAY:
That's funny… FAN
#10: He has like, changed my life... NEAL:
I can see that. BJORN:
Sting's almost as good as White Diamond. FAN
#10: Who? Never mind… Sting’s not here is he? (Looks around and leaves.) BRENDA:
Did Sting quit the Police or did the Police quit Sting? DAVE:
The pro wrestler? He was a cop? JAY:
No, but that's a good point... DON:
It sure is. NEAL:
You've got to understand that in the music industry there are certain changes
that sometimes occur, and you've just got to, sort of, accept it. Like the Police
breaking up… They were part of a British trend really. DON:
Certainly. We had big bands in the 1940’s with varying degree of style but
all the same. Then came crooners and in the 50’s, teen idols. Later on,
the first rockers Elvis and Chuck Berry. The next thing you know we had the 1960’s,
beach music, Beatles, hippies, the 70’s, southern rock, KISS and Nugent
styled music… BRENDA:
Right, and the 60’s and 70’s style changed even more dramatically
sneaking John Denver and Disco in between hard rock for a short period of time... DAVE:
You've got to be realistic about this sort of thing, you know.... Everything comes
and goes so quickly… BJORN:
In the 80’s we had European music, London bands coming out of the wood work,
then hair metal from L.A. or New Jersey and suddenly grunge in the 1990’s… DAVE:
With country rock sneaking back in and now… DON:
Britney Spears, N’Sync… Hispanic was big a few years back… Then
it all vanishes. Music comes and goes in cycles. BRENDA:
So, what happens to the bands of these eras? DON:
Watch Behind the Music on VH1. They get snatched up by labels and released for
a few years, then they take it for granted, make a little or no money at all,
blow it, and end up on VH1 after getting screwed or doing rehab. JAY:
We can't have that happen. BRENDA:
So you’re playing it smart. Not only are there no labels wanting you but
you don’t want any labels? I get it. What will the next album, or the new
reunited WD CD be like? JAY:
I'll tell you what I want to do... NEAL:
What? JAY:
A concept album! DON:
What about Broadway? I’m kidding. BJORN:
I really wouldn’t want to spend each night trying to explain to the fans
what the ‘concept’ of doing Broadway is so let’s hold off on
that idea. DON:
Well, I don't know. It could be a good thing. After all, the film itself and the
songs involved already are a concept. Why not Broadway? BRENDA:
Really? JAY:
He is joking Brenda. BRENDA:
How long do you think you can ride the wave of being in demand? DON:
I certainly do not want to be standing in front of loud amplifiers after I turn
40, that’s for sure....
DAVE: Me either... JAY:
A concert here and there would be fun. An annual or semi-annual thing… BJORN:
Oh, there's a lot we can do. BRENDA:
You have a soundtrack CD, talking about a new album, releasing all 3 CD’s
of your old music, a live album, a concept album… That’s 7 albums…
Any plans of pulling a Scorpion or Metallica or KISS stunt and performing with
an orchestra? JAY:
I've always wanted to do something like that. DON:
I don’t know who was first with that idea but I do know KISS did that back
in 81 so please don’t credit Metallica as though they had a brainstorm.
BJORN:
Deep Purple did it before KISS did. Either way this is what bands with big labels
do… BRENDA:
What? DON:
They do whatever they are told. But we more than likely won’t have 7 albums. BJORN:
Yeah! (A homeless looking stranger appears.) DON:
HEY! Why are you here now? Who told you we were here? STRANGER:
God sent me here…. BJORN:
(Whispers to Brenda, hides behind her.) It’s the Arch Angel... Like the
one in It’s Just Another Day… STRANGER:
Yeah, God sent me... DAVE:
DON? Who is this dude? DON:
Man, just get lost. I buy you a burger outside of a grocery store one day and
now you insist on following me everywhere. Why? STRANGER:
I'm an angel in disguise... DAVE:
I suppose you’re just here to guide me and protect me for my good deeds…
(Reaches in pocket and hands the man some cash.) Here, go get something to eat. BJORN:
(To Brenda) Maybe now he will leave... BRENDA:
Yeah, I think it's time to lock the door... (Manager shows up and escorts the
man outside.) What was THAT? DON:
I swear, he stopped me one day when I was out walking and asked to borrow $5.
I laughed and asked how he would pay me back. Bums usually request change, not
dollars. He said he would pay me back by getting a job. He hadn’t a home
or a car but said that he had one outfit he slept in and one he used to find work
and that he would get a job and pay me back. I don’t know, anyhow, I told
him it wasn’t necessary to pay me back and now he sleeps outside our home.
He’s on guard it seems. DAVE:
Maybe he thinks that is his job? DON:
NO. NEAL:
How did he get here, 20 miles from your home... BRENDA:
Yeah... DON:
Either by bus or by divine chariot, I don’t know! Can we move on before
Bigfoot or a UFO interrupts next? BRENDA:
That's fascinating… DAVE:
Yeah, really. Anyone here ever seen a UFO? JAY:
No but I had a beer with Elvis recently. (Don looks stressed.) Guys, guys, GUYS! BRENDA:
It's very nice to work with you guys... So much personality! JAY:
You know, we've got a lot... BRENDA:
Yeah? NEAL:
We haven’t joked like this in a while. BRENDA:
If I were to ask you to tell me something no one else knows and you really didn’t
want them to find out, but you have to answer me, what would you say? BJORN:
My balls are made from Swedish meat... JAY:
I'm the pied piper of stray cats. It’s true. Not the band. Actual cats. DON:
I wouldn’t know offhand what is or isn’t a secret about me. DAVE:
Me either. NEAL:
I did not write Hotel California despite popular belief. I did not replace Steve
Vai in Whitesnake. MANAGER:
We are about to officially close… BRENDA:
Any closing thoughts for the viewers? DON:
This was cool, letting people get to know us a bit. Thanks for setting this up.
Let us know what you want or need from us and we will see what we can do about
providing it. Can we edit out the 1000 references to maybe or maybe not doing
shows or a tour? We mentioned it so much I don’t even want to think about
such a thing. JAY:
I think the White Diamond story is an important story to get out because so many
bands from small towns like I grew up in thought once you were signed to a label,
that was it. You are set for life in your beach house with Pam Anderson. The truth
is quite different. BJORN:
Except the Pam Anderson part, she comes standard with most record contracts these
days. JAY:
It's all coming out in the wash! NEAL:
Just check out the White Diamond website. But don't forget Takara either, we aren't
so shabby! BJORN:
We have Soul Sign, Takara and White Diamond, plus Jay's solo stuff out on the
market. Just give it all a listen, see what you think. DAVE:
I hope to inspire everyone to follow their dreams. While we may not be known by
everyone, I couldn't be happier doing anything else. BJORN:
Shut up Dave. 
(Everyone
gets up and shakes Brenda’s hand. Bjorn tries to kiss her.)
THE END
| 
